I HAVE THE PLAGUE!
Ok it might not be THAT bad but I’m definitely sick…and it’s the holiday and my 31st birthday is Saturday.This couldn’t have happened at a worse time. I should have known when the fam was all sick last week that it would wait for me and hit me at the worst possible moment!
Since I’m not really eating anything and a workout is completely out of the question I’m going to talk about the other things that fill my time and life. One thing I’ve been taking some heat for in the real life and on the blog is this picture:
To answer all your questions…no I’m not pregnant…yes my socks don’t match….yes another member of our group is wearing these same socks (the other matches!)…yes my sneakers are untied I fixed that before I ran. My husband, after careful analysis of this photo, informed me I looked “hot” and if it’s good enough for him. I usually assume it’s good to go!
Mind you folks I’ve birthed two children and even before them I’ve always had a bit of a “pot” belly. I should probably do some real work on it. I’m more of an if I run a lot and lift weights a lot at some point that belly fat will need to be eaten by the rest of my body. I’m turning 31 in a few days. I might make “lose the belly fat” a goal for 2013? Maybe.
Blogging has made me a “nicer” person. Not to say I haven’t always been nice…but I’m not one to hold back though if I think you’re in need of some unsolicited advice. I also see things in blog land and social media everyday that make me want to scream, but I now hold off.
Jessica Simpson I’m looking at you sweetheart there is NO way you lost 70 pounds in 1 month then mysteriously ended up pregnant again. Your plastic surgeon did nice work!
Something I never thought I would say: Thank you Lady Gaga for gaining weight like normal people do and not taking any shit for it! AMEN!
Hey NHL can we please get some HOCKEY back on TV this year? I was unaware how terrible some TV networks are without you. Plus if you come back, I can see about 10 fewer hours of watching NHL2012 the video game in my future 😉
This cracks me up! I know the world isn’t going to end on Dec 21st….true story I heard one of my family members workers quit his job two weeks ago to enjoy the last two weeks of the world. How would you like to be that guy on Dec 22nd? Opps!
My husband and I were watching one of those end of the world shows where the archeologist “proves” what the scribbles in stone mean and how the Mayan calender ends on Dec 21st 2012. It got me thinking can you imagine what those poor fools who find our archeological remains are going to think?!
Here is my take:
In these brave games called NFL which we believe stands for Natural Fuel Loss each town would send their bravest and usually largest men into battle. Each side wore matching uniforms but often these brave warriors would look for ways to stand out from the team. Either with long hair braids, funny colorful emblems or odd writings tattooed under their eyes. Based on newspaper clippings we believe these games were broadcast on high power frequencies to people’s brains which they called a FOX. Because of the way a FOX can run fast and is said to be smart.
This fair maiden was thought to be the most pure and virtuous in the land. She and her family were the topic of many stories as she searched the land for a possible suitor. Millions watched while the beautiful maiden married her prince charming, but the marriage only lasted 74 days since her husband was stricken with a disease called “BAD TVQ”. Again this was broadcast on high power frequencies to people’s brains and also something called a CPU.
This fine product could be found in almost every American home. Some had more than one which leads us to believe this is where the families gathered to keep warm during the colder months. More affluent families had a separate oven for each family member, so there was no need to huddle and share.
We have found several of these “snuggies” that we believe were a trendy form of outer wear designed to show the status of a family. Most we have uncovered came in Red, Blue or this leopard pattern. Obviously the Leopard is the most telling. Red and Blue dyes were easy to find but leopard was a rare luxury. We also uncovered this marketing photo which showed the opulence of a Leopard Snuggie Owner.
We also have found proof that women especially those in New Jersey had alien contact. As they created devices to increase the size and shape of their heads to mirror the aliens they had come in contact with.
There also seems to have been a serious kidnapping spree of young women. Who were often seen taking photos of themselves to send to love ones to prove they were still very much alive with their captures. Most of these pictures were taken in dark, poorly lit rooms which we can assume were basement dungeons underground.
We are still trying to explain these items:
And this strange lady: