This week has been a bombardment of not so nice things in my blog reader and all across the internet. On more than once occasion this week my jaw has dropped to the floor when reading how other adults are treating one another. There are moms with abs getting ripped apart (in my opinion for being in poor taste, but brilliant marketing), people passively aggressively calling each other out as copycats and others just straight up being nasty to each other. I can’t image any of this is good for a person’s health.
I’ll admit my fatal flaw is once I lose respect for you as a person I also lose my ability to be nice to you. It’s a bad trait but it’s helped me to avoid falling back in with people who aren’t a positive influence on my life. And I’ve made peace with the fact that it is my fatal flaw.
I’ll never be a politician. I’m a horrible liar. I don’t do it and I can’t. I can’t even pretend for a second that I like you, once I’ve lost respect for you. I’m not sure how that lady on Revenge does it because I would go nuts. I’m sure if I sat down with a councilor they would explain that it’s somehow a coping mechanism, I have no idea.
I’m not sure that makes any sense but in my own brain, it the quietness of my own mind it’s the only explanation I can come up with. (Read = you have no idea what you are talking about you are not a doctor please STOP!)
This week in “the make me a better person” area of my life I’m going to *TRY* to work on civility. And based on my blog reader it might be a fun experiment for many folks this week.
What the heck is Civility? I asked the Google and it says:
Formal politeness and courtesy. Sounds easy enough. But a lot of basic common courtesy seem to have gotten lost in ipods, iphones and other nonsense. The last time you held a door open for someone was when? If you can’t answer that question in 3 seconds it might be time to rethink your level of civility.
Trust me here I’m not preaching, I am as guilty of being critical and rude as the next person. But it never hurts to try to correct bad behavior.
5 steps to Civility:
1. Good Morning, Hello, Thank you, Please, Greetings and Salutations:
USE THEM EVERYDAY. I’m making my goal to increase these words in my volcab by 50% this week. If I normally say hello to 16 people this week I’m making it a goal of 32. You never know you might make someones day by just saying hello and smiling!
2. In Social Media, Stop and THINK:
Is this something I would say outloud to this person if I was face to face with them? It’s easy to throw stones at people who seem to not respond. Why not write on a facebook page “you need a new spokeswomen, yours is horrible” because you obviously don’t see them as a person. But for ONE second stop and think if I saw her in public would I run out and tell her I think she’s ugly and should get a new job? Of course not, or at least I would hope not. And plus if you saw her face to face you might have to consider her feelings. Social media is an excellent tool to bring us together but I’m also seeing it more and more as a tool to rip people apart. I had a really bad experience and I blogged about it but everything I said I would repeat to that persons face word for word, and most of it I did say face to face before the blog. I try to maintain that same thought here as well and when I comment on other blogs. Would I say this outloud to a person in front of all of my friends? Think before you type.
3. Practice Patience
We all do dumb things, plan poorly and make mistakes. We need to be patient with people. This one is especially difficult for me, and something I need to work on. I think patience is hard in this world to begin with people are always getting things instantly. It’s difficult to wait for someone when we are chomping at the bit to tell them how they could have done it better, or best. Mistakes are how we learn. Take the time to slow down look around and enjoy the journey. Practice patience with people, things, life events and in all areas of your being.
4. Be Grateful
We all have the cards we were dealt you can be happy with them or strive to improve them. But no matter what you choose, be grateful you have cards. Show some appreciation. The power of a card in the mail that simply says thank you can mean more to people than all the phone calls in the world. Say THANK YOU, say it a lot. At any given point you always have something to be grateful for.
5. Repeat step #1-#4 Daily.
Oh and try holding the door someone. I’ll also add get out and enjoy nature. Nature is the one place where we are all humbled. Stand by the ocean, you’re not bigger than the waves. Stand in the forest and the trees are always taller. Watch a million ants working together to build a home and wonder at the warmth of the sun.
My thought is a little more civility would be good in the world this week. Heck it would be good any week. I’m a big believer in Karma, put into the world what you want to get back. This week I am encouraging you to add some thoughtfulness, a smile and patience.
Question of the day: Is it just me or could the world use some more civility?