I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her…..Please tell me I’m not the only person in the world who has this song and lyrics memorized? It’s a fun song. And who hasn’t spent time wishing for things? After all wishing is easier than all the effort it takes to DO things right?
I’ll admit it I love to flash through Fitness or Shape Magazine and say things to myself like I wish I had her….career, arms, money, butt. You know the drill. I want but I’m either too lazy or not inspired enough to do it.
I’m guilty of this more often than I care to admit. I have the desire to be good at everything, well everything except house cleaning. I’m a horrible failure at that and I own it. But most everything I want to be above average at and sometimes it’s easier to wish for it than to work for it.
Moving away from I wish to I do sounds easy enough but is it?
I like to wish I could win the lottery but even lottery winners had to “DO” by buying the ticket. And when I see those actresses in magazine’s gushing about their recent weight loss it’s easy to wish for the same to happen to me. I think that’s why diet pills and crazy get rich skeems work. People always want the easy way out. Opportunities pass by each of us everyday because they show up in overalls looking like work.
Don’t get me wrong there are people who seem to have all the luck. I mean seriously, how many people have made sex tapes and didn’t end up the next Kimmy K? But again if you look closely at that situation it wasn’t a case of dumb luck it was a carefully crafted public relations campaign aimed at making her a “celebrity”. What you missed that her dad was one of OJ’s lawyers and her family was already heavily involved in the hollywood scene? For as much as I don’t like her, gotta give girlfriend a little credit she “worked” for it.
Another example of dumb luck that is work in disguise is a darling of mine Bethenny Frankel. People think she just arrived on Bravo’s Housewives fame and that was the story of her Skinny Girl rise to fame. Most people don’t remember her scrappin’ her way through an old game show where she tried to become Martha Steweart’s Apprentice. Or knew she worked on Saved by the Bell and had created the business Bethenny Bakes long before her “sudden stardom”.
“I wish” (pun intended) I had some better non famous examples but these two just popped into my head as I’m writing this. People myself included seem to only see the end of the story but get all confused by the beginning and the middle. Success in any form whether weight loss, health and fitness, career or family don’t happen unless you do the work that’s why the I wish game is just that, a wish.
Want to be the next billionaire? Loose 100 pounds? Successfully climb the corporate ladder or have an amazing marriage? You have to turn the I wishes into I work!
This post is more a reminder to myself but I thought you would benefit from the lessons as well.
Steps to move from I wish to I DO:
Write it DOWN whether you are creating a vision board or a list of projects to complete it’s important to clearly write down your goals. Planning is the key to many successful goals. How can you reach your goals if you don’t know what they are. I encourage people to also write down the WHY of each goal. “I want to be healthier for my family, my vanity (I admit it) and myself…why because when I feel best about myself I can better focus my time and energy on useful things rather than self loathing over things I can control.”
DO THE WORK well duh! Break it out into small manageable tasks. Want to be a millionaire start by saving make a budget and stick to it. Want to lose 30 pounds? Move your feet more and add more clean food to your diet. Don’t starve yourself for the quick reward that will back fire later. Every day do one small thing that will help you reach your goal. Want a better marriage? Give your significant other a compliment it’s a small task but it’s work and goes a long way.
TELL EVERYONE I can still remember the looks I got from people when I said I want to write a blog all about heathy living. You would have thought I told them I wanted to become a serial killer. Shock and horror with some excitement. I would tell them I want to make better choices and have a documentation so I can help others on their journey. I told everyone. I still tell people about it. Want to accomplish a goal tell people about it you never know who might be able to help you reach it!
BE FLEXIBLE Not every day is going to go your way but that doesn’t mean you can give up completely. It’s easy when the chips seem does to want to give up. But persistence has its own reward.
Turn I Can’t “s” into I CAN I get it it’s not easy to say no to dessert. And it’s not easy to say to friends I can’t because I’m saving money to accomplish X,Y,Z. I know that feeling all too well. It’s hard. I’m not going to try to convince you willpower is easy it’s not. Self control is difficult there is no magic to it. It’s a battle. But remember you wrote down your goals for a reason, and even though it’s hard now it will get easier. Waking up at 5am to workout SUCKS for the first week but if physical fitness is your goal and that’s the only time you have to do it. You must turn the I can’t into I can to reach the goal.
People will say NO get used to it. Not everyone is going to believe in your dreams in fact most people won’t. If you want to accomplish your goals get used to people saying No about 85 times more often than they say yes. No isn’t always bad thing sometimes it’s a good opportunity to know when to move on. I really wanted a job a few years ago at a local company, I had contacts and connections there and I used every one of them to try to leverage even an interview with them. At the end of the day my sales background didn’t fit with their idea of a perfect fit for the position. I never did get that interview I wanted, but at least it gave me the motivation to move on. The answer was NO and I put that time and energy into other projects.
DO THE WORK it really should be every other step on this list. No one is going to do it for you. And no one is going to want it for you that entirely up to you. Get that gut burn for your goals and make them happen. DO THE WORK.
GET CREATIVE everyone’s path to success looks different. There is no ONE path to follow it’s a journey that YOU must navigate. Justin Bieber was discovered on youtube. He got creative and created videos of himself performing and put them on a social network. He told people what he (or his mom, whoever) wanted and accomplished a record deal without moving to LA and sitting through 500 rounds of demos like some. His creativity and talent set him apart. Don’t ever be afraid to get creative. I landed my first sales job with a yellow resume that claimed I was the needle in the haystack. Next to my name I added a glittery “needle”. Strangely enough there are people who still remember getting that resume who didn’t know me then that I have met in my career. Would it work for every job absolutely not! But it did for the job I wanted. I just had to set myself apart from the masses.
FORGIVE yourself. We are not perfect there will be set backs to reaching your goals. Every failure is a lesson but it’s important to remember that you need to be able to forgive. Trying to start your own business and are given bad advice from a friend/advisor. Forgive them and forgive yourself for the mistake and MOVE ON.
KNOW THE DIFFERENCE between a wish and a want. Not all I wishes are things that you can set goals and achieve. I’m 30 years old I can not be the world’s youngest professional hot dog eater. I’m above the age limit already and there aren’t time machines yet. knowing the difference between true wishes and workable wishes is a skill that only you know the answer to. Do I wish I was a doctor maybe? But can I dedicate the next 10 years of my life to mastering the craft, I don’t know so for me I would classify it as a true wish. Having a unicorn for a pet also a true wish. Losing another 20 pounds and finishing a 5k in under 25 minutes completely WORKABLE. I can do the work, set the goals and accomplish them.
Question of the Day: Thoughts? What are your workable wishes?