Resuming Normal

by Renee on July 24, 2014 · 5 comments

in life

Thank you so much for each of you who wrote and commented and reached out about yesterdays post. You have no idea how much your words mean to me and my family. It’s been a long road for us and one we thought we would be better at navigating by now. I will respond to each of you personally, I promise.  I’m slowly going through them as I go from smiling and reading… to crying and now knowing if they are tears of happiness or fear or just tears. I’m kind of a mess of emotions right now.

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And I need to give my eyes the day off today since I have an eye exam later on. It’s been two years so it’s time for new glasses!

Carla wrote a post about everyone having a hard and it was perfectly what I needed to read, right when I needed it, as so many of her posts are for me these days.

I’m also adding this post to Amanda at running with Spoons Thinking Outloud Thursday. Since I’m basically doing that.

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I woke up early and got in an at home yoga session with the Daily Burn. I hadn’t been to yoga in a while and felt kinda rusty. What I love about yoga is though you take what you need. And I needed the breathing and relaxation. Ujjayi breathing was a soul release for me.

Yoga at home

Bella also needed some yoga mat time as well. We had a tree pose and I look down to find her making herself cozy on the mat :) You can see her circling in the photo above.

Broc and I got out of the house for a hot second to the playground. He had a ball.

B at Playground

I pulled out my inner American Ninja Warrior (not really) to make it across the monkey bars. I can still remember posting many years ago I wanted to be able to do a single pull up at that park. Now I can crank them out. A little bit stronger everyday.

Monkey Bars

I promised a picture of my new hair but with all the going ons, I haven’t really felt like a photo opp.  Here is the trifecta of blog photos: New hair: Check .Glasses: Check. Selfie: Check. Silly face: Check. Bad Lighting: Double Check! This photo has it all. New hair

My new to me DSLR camera arrives today. Yes I’m going to stop hopefully torturing you with iphone photos. I think it’s time.

I’ve wanted one for so long but held out because I didn’t want to spend the money. I’ve got some new projects coming up for work and decided it was a good time to make the investment.  I’m feeling all flashy now! New glasses today, new mac book, new camera…shesh let me know if you find a money tree cause I’m about to set it on Fiiiyyyyaaa!

Other projects: Our kitchen remodel. That’s on a bit of a stand still right now. When I said our house projects take us forever that wasn’t me being funny, it’s the flat-out truth. And sometimes when you are tearing apart really old structures you find a random roof you didn’t know was there? It’s also important to note if you yell random quotes you find hilarious to your tired and frustrated husband about said roof, he will get angry.

For Example:

“That’s a sweet roof pitch, maybe we should keep it”

“The Roof, the roof, the roof is  onnnnn….in our ceiling?”

“Who builds a roof OVER another roof, I guess they won’t leak?”

“So I guess we won’t get wet even if we tear out the walls?”

These are not funny, and did nothing to lighten the mood.

So until we make a plan for the newly discovered roof, we are standing still. I should contact that show renovation realities, we are perfect for them. We have charisma, we think we are funny and our renovations always turn quickly into dark ominous nightmares :)

And trust me we have had a few good laughs about the random roof. Upon discovery of the roof was  just a little too soon for bad jokes. Timing is everything in comedy.

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Question of the Day: Do you make jokes in awkward situations? 

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When Life hands you Lemons

by Renee on July 23, 2014 · 13 comments

in life

I always try to be extremely upbeat here. Keeping it positive and encouraging but life doesn’t always work in the upbeat. I don’t really talk much about my son’s medical issues, it isn’t my story to tell, it’s his. I talk about it when it affects me and yesterday went from an average day to gut wrenching in about 2 hours flat.

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We went in for  simple 30 minute ear tube surgery and instead were given some rather upsetting news and scheduled for another follow-up surgery next week.

My husband and I just sat in shock listening as the doctor shared the news with us. It was like nothing he had ever seen and we needed to see another specialist since this was out of our own specialists knowledge base.

That’s the thing about having a rare disorder, no one ever really knows. This was surgery #11 in 7 short years and now we are looking at #12 next week.

My gut sort of churns when the nurses recognize us on the pediatric surgery floor. He’s a regular, and he’s always a good sport about what is going to happen.

My husband and I joke that we own our own hall in the hospital and soon we’ll have our own wing. We can pick out first timers in the waiting room and know which hospital elevators lead where. If you’ve ever been to Upstate those yellow elevators are tricky, but that’s how to get to the treehouse.

I suppose we at the very least have a good attitude about it? I’m not sure. We do seem to be private about it. I’ll be honest that even my immediate family doesn’t really know everything that goes on with it. I guess just like anything that’s different at some point it becomes a chore to explain it all.

Even after getting the news at the hospital yesterday, I kicked myself for posting that photo above on facebook before it was over. See these are the things we think about before we go. Usually if we take a photo  at all, we don’t post anything until it’s over and all is well. Yesterday I was excited for our first “easy” surgery in and out in less than an hour SCORE! And posted without thinking.

Well I was thinking, but thinking surely everything would go well. This was the first surgery we had requested, as in we made the appointment to say he lost a tube it’s time for new ones.

We never expected bad news. The worst part is when you get bad news trying to explain it to people. Especially when we don’t really have answers.

Then comes the blame how did we not notice? The past few months have been difficult for him. The TV was on volume level 26 most of the time. He hasn’t been listening. I have been yelling.

We assumed it was the tubes. Assumed it was the end of the school year. Assumed it was anything else.

And now we wait. We wait for the next surgery, wait for the specialist. And wait for answers. Waiting is the worst. You try to forget about it and keep things as normal as possible, but nothing is really normal.

If you have healthy children give them an extra hug today and be thankful. If you don’t know you’re not alone, and things will get better.

Thanks for letting me sort out my feelings here today. I promise to resume healthy-living posts tomorrow.

 

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I feel like on any given day these are my feelings about going to the gym, and the feelings I have while at the gym. Really it’s just a collection of feels.

I arrive and I’m all YES! Today I am going to kick this workouts ass! I am pumped with all the energy I need to seize the day.

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My legs could run forever: lemon-happyrunaway1

And no amount of weight is too much: Weightlifting Pants Burst

Then I arrive at the gym and get ready for the workout. 20 minutes in I  start to wonder if I’m doing the right workout:

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And I notice some other equipment I want to use is being used by a lady on her cell phone:

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So I make my way over to something else. Usually by this point I’m already fed up with the music on the Pandora channel I’m listening too, but keep listening for fear a really great song will come on that makes me want to dance. You can’t waste a great song on a lull in your workout.

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I will make my way over to the free weights. And after one set, will discover my energy level is slightly lower than previously thought. And I will struggle through two more sets. Just telling myself I can do it.

Weightlifting Snow Fail

Once finished with weights. I start to think that I will give myself the pass. I’ve probably already done 30 minutes of work and could call it a day.

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But then while trying to decide what to do next I notice a random dude checking me out:

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And decide life is safer on the treadmill:

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Once the crisis is averted. I suddenly have a blast of renewed energy and power though another 45 minutes of workout.

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I finish sweaty and excited. Then walk to the child watch area and pick up my boys and remember I’m tired.

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I drive home thinking of food and wishing for a nap.

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I arrive home and eat and take a shower because:

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The endorphins kick in and all I can think about is doing it all over the next day!

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Legal ways to stalk me around the interwebs:

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